Orc allies and a reckoning with the manticores

'Stop this madness!' - Milgos channeling his inner drow

Urgosh and friends

Milgos spent time recharging his newly acquired wand of magic missiles. Its discovery had him reconsider his prior tactic of leaping into the middle of combat swinging his daggers. Yet the visceral thrill of carving up his opposition was irresistible to the dark elf and he soon found himself purchasing a fine set of matching short swords. He trawled the markets of the city hunting for bargains and found a downtrodden peasant called Berk who’d serve as torchbearer (and who would be completely forgotten by all in the coming conflicts) and a scroll of armour, a spell that was sure to increase his life expectancy. Ugh on the other hand purchased as many flasks of oil as seemed practical for he recalled the tale of ooze that guarded a secret treasure.

Feeling confident the group returned to the dungeon and found their way back to the chamber from which they had left off. The kobolds, whom they had rescued last delve, were lounging about their chamber feasting on the dried remains of dire rat and oblivious to the parties presence. Ugh marched and kicked the chair out from under on of the poor creatures. Howling in dismay from the dungeon floor the kobold looked up at the armoured half orc that towered overhead. Ugh sought information about the surrounds and learnt that the orcish leader in a nearby chamber was a brute who liked challenges. “Perhaps,” the kobold suggested “you could challenge the brute for leadership of the orcs.” Finding the idea plausible, Ugh accentuated his orc heritage as best he could with the assistance of the kobolds. He bloodied his weapon, draped himself in rancid rat furs and plaited bones into his hair. This ruse would later fail, let down by the half orc’s cultured demeanour and even temperament. Still as the group left the kobolds, Ugh practised his mean skills; insulting the creatures by deliberately mistaking them for gnomes. Gnomes are of course a kobolds arch nemesis. The kobolds were left fuming and conflicted; the heroes had saved them but were also mean.

The mean heroes considered their immediate options. To the north purportedly lay the secret treasure guarded by ooze. A sizzling sound from that direction lent credence to the kobolds intelligence. Behind the door to the west lay the orcs. Milgos placed an ear to the door and made out a low muttering from beyond. Perhaps it was orcish, he couldn’t be sure despite being a fluent speaker of the language. There they stood undecided for some time before Milgos did what he often does and that’s make a rash decision. He opened the door and crept into the chamber sneaking about he determined that the orcs sat at a table concealed by a curtain. Their chest lay in the room unobserved and undefended. Tempting a target though it may be Milgos returned to inform his companions.

The party planned an ambush which was let down by the braying of Fang, Ugh’s hyena. The orcs wrenched aside the curtain, took in the situation and flipped the table grabbing their spears and shields and formed a defensive formation. “Come get us cowards!” screamed Urgosh the largest of the orcs and their nominal leader.


Heated words were exchanged between Ugh and Urgosh till the full blooded orc could stand no more. The creature strode out from behind the shield wall of it's companions ready to duel the half blood till both combatants were stunned into inaction. "STOP THIS MADNESS!" shouted Milgos the dark elf stepping out from the cover from which he had been watching. The dark elf turned to the orc. "Do you know whom I represent? You know my people, you know our ways. You do not want to anger me." The orc gulped and looked about nervously. "Do not waste blood duelling my slave." Milgos gestured to Ugh. "We have bigger enemies to defeat. Follow me and bring you men. We hunt a pair of manticores. You shall share in the spoils." The orc needed little convincing, seemingly cowed by Milgos' impressive act. Urgosh gathered his orcs and the whole band set off.


Returning to the swampland above the group the group found the entrance to the troglodyte caverns. From there they rushed the manticores who were caught unawares, lounging as they were after a big meal near their underground lake. The orcs took advantage of their spears reach skewering the brutes while Milgos battered the creatures with magic missiles and Ugh weighed in with his blade. The brutes managed a few inept volleys of tail spikes, that felled a pair of orcs, before being decapitated by a rampaging Ugh. The orcs were given a number of golden cups from the treasure pile. They celebrated by filling them from the manticores underground lake. Miraculously their wounds healed. The orcs believed they had magic cups. Milgos, aided by the magic of his staff of the apprentice, new the truth; the pool was enchanted with healing magic.


Milgos harnessed his orcish allies high spirits by turning them towards clearing out some nearby mounted troglodyte guards. Again the companions revisited a chamber they had explored before. They planned a pincer like strike on the troglodytes but lost the initiative. Their reptilian foe let out a loud screech as they goaded their huge iguana mounts towards the band. The terrifying noise saw Fang and the orcs flee in terror. Fang couldn't escape however as Ugh held the hyena's chain tightly in his shield hand. Milgos muttered an arcane chant and the troglodytes fell asleep in their saddles. During the melee Ugh was wrapped up by one of the lizards tongues from which he struggled to escape. Jana, fearing for the half orcs life, leapt into the conflict with her mace but was promptly snatched up by another giant lizard who threatened to tear her asunder. Betty and Beautrice carried the day as they put the lizards to the sword. Upon surveying the scene Milgos was left cursing. He had lost his orc allies and these blasted troglodytes didn't even have the courtesy to carry their treasure with them.


The battle resolved the group retreated in good order. Back in town they planned their next move.

Troglodyte Warrens

Hurling hyenas

'Go on. Get the mage. Good boy.' - Ugh to Fang II

One of these hyenas is Fang II

Milgos let out a long sigh and slumped at the inn’s table. He had been interviewing potential hirelings all day and none were suitable. Too old, too fat and even those that had seemed fit enough to hold a torch where too ugly. He was lucky to have hired on the feisty warrior women Betty and Beatrice when he did. While the dark elf had been interviewing Ugh had been drinking. He was living the life now, drinking Bugman’s finest from the top shelf. Beneath his table his ‘dog’ Fang crunched through chicken carcass after chicken carcass. Fang’s gluttony could be excused as the beast needed the energy for the coming delve. ‘It’s time to go’ Milgos said as he stood. “It’s just you, your hound and the girls. Let us hope that will be enough for the trials ahead.”

Hurrying through the cleared upper caverns the band once more found themselves descending a flight of stairs. At their base a familiar statue issued it’s customary challenge to which the group responded with their names and titles. Nothing adverse happened so they pressed on till they came to a door. Both placed an ear against it and yet heard nothing. Fang however let out a low growl. Ugh grabbed the handle and heaved the door open.

Beyond was a wizard’s laboratory. Along the walls was an assortment of bones. Long benches covered in candles and apparatus of a magical nature cluttered the place. A man in long crimson robes stood at a lectern intently studying a tome. Close to the door the group had flung open reclined a warrior in mail with a sword on his lap. Milgo’s dropped a globe of darkness on the surprised robbed figure while Ugh and the hired help savaged the seated warrior. The unfortunate fighter swiftly fell to their assault. Cursing the darkness the wizard called upon his minions to strike and lo and behold the bones along the walls assembled themselves into skeleton warriors.  During the conflict Ugh hurled Fang into the globe of darkness hoping his dog would attack the mage. In fact he gave strict instructions to the hyena to do this but was ignored as the hyena could not understand common. Instead it preferred to crush the skulls of the undead between it’s slavering jaws. Eventually the mage was put down while trying to flee and there was much rejoicing at the loot won. Milgos used his staff of the apprentice to identify several valuable magical items.

It was during the looting that the party decided to split up. After some pranks involving a wizard locked door’ Milgos got bored and decided to see what lay beyond a door to the south. It was skeletons wielding spears and an excellent opportunity for the dark elf to test out his newly acquired wand. At one stage the skeletons forced the door that Betty and Beatrice were holding, barging into the room and almost slaying the two ladies. Luck was with Milgos however as his wand blasted several to pieces. Ugh made a timely return from his own exploration to finish off the few remaining skeletons. Janna called on her diety to heal the wounds of the girls before the group pressed on.

Heading further south the heroes heard high-pitched yelping and squeeking. Around a corner they saw a group of kobolds trapped on a table as a swarm of giant rats leaped up trying to bite them. The kobolds pleaded for help and the hero’s obliged. The rat’s teeth were sharp and their numbers substantial. Ugh and Fang weathered the furry storm emerging victorious despite suffering from several nasty bites.

The kobolds rewarded their rescuers with a tale of treasure in a secret chamber to the north but warned that orcs also laired that way as well as an ooze. The treasure would have to wait as the band was exhausted and running low on resources. They retreated in good order back to the surface.

Hyenas, kobolds and obvious traps

'Milgos dares enter your domain for he is both brave and handsome' - Milgos

A pre-shaken kobold.

Milgos hires on two lovestruck washerwomen named Betty and Beatrice, whom he arms and armours. Clearly they are a fan of his exotic ebony skin. That and the dark elf paid them upfront and threw in a bonus. Back at his room the wizard picked up his spell book and the staff he had been given upon his graduation – the staff of the apprentice. Ugh gets a new dog, only it’s a hyena. Janna, the hobbit cleric, agrees to accompany them back into the dungeon.

On the way back down they encounter some under-hobbits who invite them back to their home after their expedition. Ugh knows he was placed under a spell the last time he had dealings with the sly folk but he humours them.

A statue challenges them on their way down a flight of stairs. They proclaim their names – we learn Ugh’s full title. Milgos searches it for some form of secret but it’s not special. Marching down the corridor the group are ambushed by kobolds some of which spring from behind an illusionary wall. Milgos goes beserk and becomes a whirling dervish with twin daggers. The kobolds flee just when the blood crazed dark elf seemed at his most vulnerable, his unarmoured form leaping into the centre of the melee. The kobold leader leads them through a number of rooms hurling the door open each time in his desperation to escape. He is caught and stabbed by Milgos before being shaken to death by the hyena.

The room the kobold fled to had a statue with scythe and beheaded skeleton. Milgos urged Ugh to be cautious but Ugh did not care. He strode into the room and the statue came to whirling trap like life swinging the scythe towards the half orc. Ugh ducked and the statues weapon careened off his shield. They loot the kobolds.

Further exploration discovered the body of a pale elf. Milgos said a prayer for the fallen, because he is good, then immediately looked at the ceiling. Tis as if the dark elf had the soul of an old school adventurer. Indeed something stirred on the ceiling, two giant ticks. The first fell under a reign of steely blows while the second turned to flee it was bitten in twain by Fang, Ugh’s imaginately titled Hyena. Getting back to the good thing, Milgos rebelled against the evil drow society and turned to niceness and good. Thus the prayer for the elf, the dark elves mortal enemy and the lavish coin heaped upon his hirelings.

Rogue Trader

Even though they are marines this picture is still awesome!

It’s Rogue Trader’s 25^th anniversary. It’s been a decade or two between games. I had the hardcover book back in year 7. It cost $50, which was a lot at the time. I’m guessing I bought it myself but maybe my parents forked over the cash. If they did I am sure they regret it. My dad would cleverly call it Wham Bangers instead of Warhammer but I guess all in all my parents thought the hobby was harmless. Sure it would nix any chance I'd have of getting a date but there were worse things a teenager could be doing.

Iron Bonce the squat merc.

I hate this guy.

I would pour through the books and magazines trying to find the coolest things that would let me win. Vortex grenades, dreadnought suits, high level psionics would all be carefully added to my army list and the points meticulously calculated.

Army wise I really hated Space Marines. I think I did this just to be different. I guess hating the most popular army made me edgey and cool, at least in my own hormone addled mind. I bought blisters of all kinds of models with my paper round money. Orks, Eldar, mercenaries (including the squat with the rotating hand cannon) and old school Tyranids I’d settle on Imperial guard and Orks and take my badly painted armies to the local tournament at Melbourne Uni High. In those hallowed educational halls older folk would slaughter my troops with rorty crap like Harelquin’s hiding in ectoplasmic mist and whole armies comprising of just terminators with cyclone missle launchers.

Who's idea was it to give space marines cover?

Lately I've had a hankering for all things Citadel, 80’s Citadel. So me and a buddy from primary school, who I dragged into this miniature madness, got out Rogue Trader and had a game. Historically I won these battles as I was the only one who bothered to read the rules. As everyone depended on me to play the game I could conveniently forget rules that would disadvantage me. I was also a competitive kid so I’d argue lots if it looked like I was in danger of losing. I was crap to play against but somehow my friends would still rock up and play. I guess the models and the world were compelling enough to put up with my nonsense.

Thinning the herd.

So on Sunday we held a ‘Battle for the farm’ straight from the pages of Rogue Trader. The terrain consisted of boxes. A robot took the place of a damaged generator. My Tyranids were Ork proxies and plastic bags indicated where an orchard lay. Early on the Orks learnt to spread out lest they succumb to plasma missiles. I swore to kill the missile launcher punk as quickly as I could, but alas by the end of the game only two marines were slain and the missile launcher operator was not among them. The one time I got a wound on him his wretched power armour saved.

Deploy on the pizza box.

Heading for cover far too late.

At one point well after the game looked over, the sole remaining ork squad along with Hruk the Ork back up boss, hid out in the orchard only for my buddy to use rules against me! Or cruel reversal of childhood fortunes. Some rule said he could fire at models that were hidden as long as he did so with area effect weapons. And so the ork’s refuge turned into a roiling plasma orchard with the final two survivors making a mad dash for freedom, routing off the board. The Orks were smashed in an embarrassing display. Fortunately the Ork leader had called in reinforcements before he was sniped by the space marine commander. Only two marines would escape the field before an overwhelming amount of orks arrived.

Now I have a difficult decision. Do I being to build a small squad of Rogue Trader era models or do I continue to build my mini chaos warband. Hmm, after looking at those pictures perhaps I should invest in some terrain.

Tunnels, manticores and survival

"Move your rump out of my way!" - Milgos

One of the manticores. There are two.

The spider muttered something about the group not being worthy of the master’s attention before Ugh grew sick of the beast and threatened to pee on it. The spider scurried away leaving the half orc to catch up with Jana and her companion in private. Her till now unconscious companion was a dark elf who was actually a nice enough person with a penchant for magic. He tended towards arrogance but had forsworn his dark brethrens edgy lifestyle. While Milgos sorted himself out Ugh set about finding a way out of the cell in which they found themselves. Using a thigh bone as a chisel and skull as a hammer he set about the walls only to find them particularly weak at a certain point. He persisted with his hammering to reveal a narrow walk space. Janna, being a small hobbit, was sent to scout it out. To the north she found a huge sinkhole and to the south a chamber guarded by mounted trogs. While Jana was gone the spider returned but was again put to flight at the sight of ugh adjusting the drawstring on his trousers and threatening to douse the creature with a substance other than oil.

The party decided to crawl south along a very cramped escape tunnel. Jana lead the way and was challenged at one point by the owner of the tunnel. She described the creature as a humanoid mole like creature. Milgos insisted on trying to see the critter but the half-orc block his vision. The Dark elf cursed and desperately squeezed but to no avail, he suspected it was a deep gnome but was unable to confirm this. The creature asked if they were friends of the lizard folk. Ugh said no but the dark elf said yes. The critter wished them luck and left them to continue grazing their arms and legs as they wormed their way along the narrow passage.

Bah quick summary to continue and be fleshed out later.

Trogs distracted dark elf’s sound spell of footsteps. Party sneak past.

Party encounter two manticores. Won’t give up Halfling as food. Darkness spell. Manticores cursing. Party running.

Head back along tunnel to hear spider cursing their escape.

Find stairs down. Looking for way out not way deeper. Continue.

Find strange metal curtain. Leave alone.

Find metal statue and rusting devices. Shimmy down crevasse to check things out when attacked by statue. Ugh badly hurt. Flee.

Hear ogre and flee. Hide in mushroom forest. Ogre seems friendly but wants loot. Party have no treasure so ogre disappointed. Brother of other ogre Ugh bought the dog for. Hole in roof of mushroom chamber. Ogre gives silk to sell in town and gear up, his investment in their expedition to kill the manticores and take their treasure. Ogre gives boost and party escapes.

Dragons, assassins and thieves

‘I’ll wait then assassinate them some more.’ – Thorc on his ill-fated mission

It's called dungeons and dragons for a reason

Thorc and Ugh returned to the entrance they had located in the Brackenfells swamplands. Thorc scouted his way down all but invisible to the naked eye wearing the shadows like a cloak. At the entrance chamber he noted the two guardian lizards this time supported by three hideous reptilian trogs. The Trogs seemed engrossed in some form of game involving bones and so the dwarf edged closer to one of the monstrous giant lizards. Picking his moment the assassin slit the beasts throat releasing a stream of acidic ichor. The sizzle and smell alerted the trogs whose deafening screech echoed throughout the warrens. Thorc fled back up the stairs with the brutes breathing down his neck. At the top of the stairs Ugh and his hound fang waited in ambush. The fight was short and brutal with the trogs displaying insane courage or stupidity as they battled to the death.

With combat over Thorc again crept down the stairs hoping to catch the remaining guard lizard unawares. He was surprised to note a number of hooded trogs wielding wicked jagged blades taking in the scene and setting up a watch. They had emerged from a nearby sink hole and moved in such a way as to remind the dwarf of assassins. Thorc watched them for a moment before he heard the armoured clanking of his half orc companion. Ugh had become bored of waiting for the dwarf. The trogs looked to be setting an ambush for his companion and so Thorc sprung his own throwing a dagger at the nearest trog and spoiling the creatures assassination attempt. During the battle a trog fled east, Ugh considered following him but instead chose to finish the trog assassins closer to hand.

Another brutal and short combat saw the pair victorious. Fearing reinforcements from the sinkhole from which the trog assassins had emerged Ugh sealed the sinkhole with a flick of his door producing wand creating a trapdoor. The pair began piling bodies onto the trapdoor when they were interrupted by a deep booming voice.

“Well what have we here?” the pair turned to see a reptilian beast with scales of a deep ocean blue. It’s long sinuous neck and wings reminded the pair of the tales of dragons. “Why if it isn’t the thieves back for more. I see you are carrying my helmet and shield. Return all you stole and I shall consider letting you live.” Thorc began backing away. “Don’t think I cannot see you dwarf! Stay where you are and return that helm and I might let you live. I shall not ask you again and I give you 5 seconds to ponder your decision.” Ugh made a non committal grunt and Thorc began to run. The Water Dragon exhaled and a great cloud of acid filled the chamber. Thorc and Fang flesh melted from their bones and they died howling. The world about Ugh went dark.

Ugh opened his eyes. If this was the after life why was a hobbit woman staring down at him. Where was the fighting and valkyries of Valhalla he had been promised? “Thank goodness you are alive.” The hobbit said. “We were captured by the trogs and I fear will be sacrificed soon. You were badly injured but Yollanda, my god healed you. My name is Jana.”
“Silence!” hissed a shadowed figure. It scurried forward and Ugh could se his jailor was a giant arachnid gifted bizarrely with speech.

Assassinating iguanas and loot!

“That giant iguana looked threatening. Lucky for you I assassinated it.” - Thorc

A troglodyte. They died like chumps.

Thorc had been slumming it in the city. He’d been slumming it for a while now as his funds were running low. The guild he nominally worked for didn’t have any contracts at the moment, or at least no contracts for a fresh-faced dwarf new to the business. He was busy drowning his sorrows when he was approached by a bulky half-orc. The pair struck up an instant friendship based on a mutual love of gold, killing and adventure. Before he knew it Thorc had agreed to hire on with the half orc as he delved into the darkness beneath – the mega-dungeon on the outskirts of the city.

The band descended beneath the earth into the entrance cavern that Ugh was now more than familiar with. After a hurried conversation they ventured south towards the cave of Gulag the ogre and hopefully the lizard folk lair. Ugh conducted a brief trade for two potions of transformation for which he exchanged a dog to serve as a loyal companion to the ogre. While the trade was conducted Thorc set about pilfering as many coins from the ogres abode as possible though his thievery was delayed somewhat by his confusion concerning the ogre’s mysterious accent. Was it French?

Happy with the trade the group continued exploring the tunnels further south west. There they found a grisly warning, several Neanderthal heads, lizard maws and crab shell parts were spiked on stakes and on clear gruesome display. Continuing undeterred the band encountered a troll alone in a cave piled with bones. The troll was amenable to conversation and Ugh held a brief chat during which he was warned to watch out for the fungus and asked to hunt up some crab meat from the crab folk that lived in east. The conversation started to degenerate when Ugh mentioned the possibility of a trade and the troll headed over to its bone pile to dig out the pretty bottles it had been saving. Unfortunately Thorc had been into the beasts treasure pile and cleared the troll out. Heated words were exchanged and Ugh swore to retrieve the missing coins and bottles from his small sneaky companion. When Ugh caught up with Thorc the rogue denied ever messing with the trolls stuff and rather than waste time arguing the pair set off again though Ugh swore to keep an eye on the shifty dwarf.

Their next major encounter was with trogyldytes. The shifty looking mutant trog with frogs legs was the first to fall though it was soon joined by its reptilian brethren. The group had taken a few minor wounds and early on the combat the trogs screech had scared off Fang whom the group had to track down. Ugh sure was attached to the mutt. Sadly the trogs had no treasure on them. An alcove off the trog room held a iguana stable housing a single giant iguana. Ugh considered the docile beast before him thinking it would make a great mount. Lost in thought he was surprised to see a hand axe take half the beasts head off. Thorc quickly ran to retrieve his weapon. “I just saved you from that iguana. Thank me later.” Opening the iguana’s saddlebags Thorc was delighted to find an unlabelled potion. He uncorked it “Don’t worry it will be healing.” He mentioned to the concerned looking half-orc. Much to the DM’s disappointment the dwarf was right and the minor wounds he had suffered in the trog battle and from a minor punji pit trap were healed.

Scouting south the band found a tunnel that had been fortified with rocks as if attempting to seal off something in the chamber beyond. Hooking up a grapple hook the pair shimmied down into the chamber only to see it full of floating orbs wreathed with tentacles. Deciding discretion was the best bet they hurriedly retreated. Disconcertingly the orbs gave pursuit but where swiftly out-distanced.

Further exploration led to a tunnel filled with mist. Initially apprehensive about it the group decided to chance it. As they breathed deeply of the mist they found their spirits set free from their bodies and melding into one spirit which the two great minds battled for control of. They took this out of body experience as an opportunity to explore. They found a cave full of fish within which was a submerged tunnel which lead ultimately to a larger lake that housed a creature’s substantial treasure pile. Further exploration discovered a tunnel to the swampland above. The out of body experience was not to last however and they were soon back in their bodies, Fang slumbering blissfully unaware next to them.

While Ugh pondered how to get to the sizeable horde Thorc came up with the easy answer. Using his advanced direction sense the dwarf could determine the approximate location of the swamp entrance on the surface. Ugh saw the logic in the plan and the pair retreated from the dungeon to slog across the swamp. It was not long before they had discovered the swamp entrance to the trog. lair.

The swamp entrance descended into the earth and its entrance chamber was guarded by two ferocious and enormous lizards with acid for spittle. Unfortunately for the lizards they were chained to the caverns wall and with such slow reactions the group sprinted past them as they ponderously maneuvered to intercept. Racing to the horde room Thorc dived in to the lake and plundered all the important looking gems and items as swiftly as he could. Both of them knew that staying too long risked the owner of the horde returning which could spell doom for their expedition. Laden with the most valuable of treasures the pair fled back past the languid guardian lizards and returned to the surface.

Infernal crabs and bewitchment

"Now that Karl is dead I get his share right?" - Franz the porter

Would you trust these Under hobbits?

Once more Ugh found himself in a tavern surrounded by spiritless men and shiftless women. He found himself light on funds having paid for training and so promised an untried duo Karl and Franz 10% of the loot found on the next expedition. Karl looked like he could barely hold a sword and Franz wasn’t interested in fighting at all though he agreed to help carry the lantern and any sacks of loot required. Figuring this was the best he was going to be able to do Ugh ventured once more into the darkness beneath.

This time he explored to the northeast towards the Halflings. Fang the orc-mastiff growled as it approached the area. It had picked up the scent of orcs though these orcs had perished some days ago, their bodies decomposing in the corridor undisturbed. Ugh continued and was surprised to find the Under Halfling hiding spot abandoned. Pressing on he emerged in a large cavern full of stalagmites. Earlier Ugh had lent Karl his old bastard sword and the hireling had been busily swinging the blade in practise motions at stalagmites despite Ugh’s insistence that he stop mucking around. As they explored the natural cavern Ugh heard a manly shriek. Karl dropped the blade swearing it had turned into a serpent before his very eyes. It was then that a booming voice ordered them to drop their weapons and treasure of they would regret it. Ugh would have none of this and eventually called the voices bluff. Five Halflings with slings at the ready emerged from their hiding spots about the cavern. The half-orc and his companions felt outmatched and fled.

Cursing the loss of his sword and vowing to take it out of Karl’s wages, Ugh returned to the cavern. Here he encountered a short fellow wearing a jaunty hat, carrying a cane and speaking with a lilting voice that sounded like a poor version of Irish. As it so happened the diminutive fellow was Ugh’s best friend or so the half-orc believed for he had been bewitched. Ugh was for some reason still deeply suspicious of his new best friend but did permit the short fellow to cast a spell of invisibility on his dog.

Upon return to his hirelings Ugh found Karl doubtful of the Halflings motives but Ugh shrugged his accusations off. Ignoring Karl’s pleas to put the little buggers to the sword Ugh stomped off to the south to explore the area where his one time thief companion had heard reptilian roars.

The band was confronted by the severed heads of several elves placed on spikes in the twisting tunnels to the south. The elves decapitated bodies lay as they fell. The group barely had time to take in the grisly warning when they heard the sounds of combat echoing along the tunnels. Creeping ahead they saw a band of troglydytes and Neanderthals locked in melee. The Neanderthals appeared to be protecting a demonic looking crab human hybrid. Ugh let the battle play out for a while partly to allow each side to wear each other down but also because he did not know which side to aid. Eventually Ugh leapt to the assistance of the troglydytes, choosing to do battle with the unnatural crab abomination. Karl held back but later would join the fray only to be cut down by a Neanderthals crab claw club. Such is the brutal and short life of the hireling.

The battle was grueling; Ugh was finding it difficult to land a telling blow with his great sword as his opponent’s solid shell served as most effective armour. Fang was having a great time of it felling several brutes with his powerful jaws. The crab beast turned out to be some form of shaman and it channeled mystic energy into its mighty claw before landing a telling blow on Ugh, which rent through the half-orcs armour. Badly wounded Ugh called the retreat and easily outdistanced the crab thing as the beast found it difficult to navigate the tunnels, as it had to scuttle sideways. Ugh reached into his pack and retrieved the wand of doors he had found earlier. He uttered the command word and magically a sturdy door popped into existence sealing the tunnel behind him and protecting his retreat.

It did not take long for the crab thing to reach the door and begin battering it down. The door had bought Ugh enough time to reach the pool of healing and take a long draught. Feeling better Ugh went looking for the crab beast again and lured the enraged abomination into the Halfling chamber. Surely his new friends would aid him in his battle.

Instead the Halflings were angry. They cursed the half-orc for bringing such a deadly foe to their home. Such was not the act of a friend, they declared. Ugh and Fang would have to battle the brute on their own and they did for a time. Fang landed some heavy blows tearing into the creatures face. It staggered under the blows and looked ready to fall. At the command ‘Finish them’ the Halflings drew short swords and looked ready to move in. Ugh hoped they were going to assist. In the end the Halflings had left it too late as Fang the mighty Orc-Mastiff seized the creatures head in its powerful jaws and tore it clean off. The battle had ended and the unnatural crab abomination was no more.

Ugh returned to the southern tunnels to search the main battle site in the hope of loot. He was disappointed that the combatants had nothing of worth though Franz his porter did spot a ruby clutched in the hand of one of the decapitated elves. Rigor mortis had set in and some finger bones had to be broken to liberate the gem. Thus far the expedition had yielded only this gem as treasure. Eager for more the band pressed on exploring the twisting tunnels.

It did not take long before they were challenged by a towering brutish ogre. Fortune smiled on Ugh for the ogre was inclined to talk and even offered to share one of the troglydytes that the brute planned to eat. The ogre introduced himself as Gulag and offered to trade with the half-orc for a few potions he had lying about. Unfortunately the ogre wanted an impressive hound like Fang as a trade. Fang was far too valuable and so Ugh refused. The half-orc did get to spy the ogre’s treasure horde as the brute dug through the pile to find things for trade. Deciding not to press his luck Ugh bid the ogre good day and retreated back to the safety of the surface.

Entry level to the Darkness Beneath

Mastiffs and abominations

"Oh crap. That's not fair. I already killed it once!" - Ugh

Fang I. The orc-mastiff that survived.

Ugh looked about the tavern but sadly none within shared his adventurous spirit. Sighing he took on the services of a sullen man at arms named Werner and headed for the dungeon. On the way he passed the cities kennels and decided to recruit some canine allies. Fortune favoured the half-orc who walked out with two orc-mastiffs, huge brutal dogs bred for hunting orcs. Ugh was lucky that his half-orc heritage had not left him with an orcish scent

Entering the dungeon Ugh returned to the hobgoblin occupied cave where he and his thievish companion had left off. The unfortunately named hobgoblin Furby remained in the cavern though he had little to say. Ugh had the hobgoblin help him lower his two mastiffs down a short drop before exploring some tunnels inscribed with odd tribal markings from an ancient lizard man culture. Many of the carvings depicted lizardmen cavorting with dinosaurs. While engrossed in deciphering these complex carvings Ugh’s lead mastiff took a tumble down a pit. Ugh held the lead tight and for a time seemed to be choking his own dog. Eventually he lowered the beast to the base of the pit and discovered that the shaft led to a series of tunnels.

Ugh bravely descended and began exploring. He discovered three orange gems that glowed with an inner fire lying discarded in the centre of separate chambers. Despite his paranoia these did not seem to be trapped. It was then that he discovered a door into a mist shrouded corridor. Holding his breath he plunged in. After some exploring, hampered by the vision obscuring mist, Ugh stumbled across a tentacled fire breathing floating abomination. The battle was a drawn out affair wherein Werner and one of the hounds perished in gouts of flame and Ugh himself was badly burned. Eventually Ugh’s remaining dog Fang wore the creature down ripping out the beast’s central eye. Yet this did not seem to be the end for the creature. It appeared shimmering in a mystical circle in the floor before letting lose with another burst of flame that mercifully missed. Ugh retreated then attempted to dispel the abomination by throwing the collected orange crystals into the mystic circle and hoping for some sort of reaction. Perhaps he was successful as the monster winked out of existence and bothered him no more. Ugh was free to loot the creature’s substantial horde.

Beaten and bloodied Ugh pressed his luck with a little more exploration of the tunnels within the pit. Pushing west he encountered a room full of statues including one of an intriguing crocodile. Its jaws were hinged in such a fashion to suggest it would accept donations. Ugh fed it the fire crystals and as a reward he felt smarter, stronger and more charismatic. Not wishing to press his luck further Ugh retreated from the dungeon.

A map back when I was motivated enough to draw them by hand

Allies, decapitated toads and loot

“I dub thee Ugh Toad slayer.” – Willyam

The giant toad. Note head still attached.

Ugh ventured once more beneath the earth. This time he shared the risk and reward with Willyam the human thief along with a desperate mecenary and a pair of torch bearers.

Ugh was surprised to hear Willyam initiate the idea of scouting ahead. The last thief Ugh had taken up with had been reluctant to risk his life serving as point man. Willyam scouted to the edges of the torch light allowing his eyes to adjust to the murky gloom. Eastward he crept till his ears made out the sound of some reptilian roar reverberating from far off long the twisting tunnels. Rather than discover the nature of the roar Willyam chose to scout the remaining tunnels that lead into the entrance chamber. Ugh looked disappointed as he longed to shed blood. Willyam explained his decision as a preference to leaving nothing at his back.

Scouting north Willyam came across the slumped body of an orc, its throat slit. Proceeding cautiously Willyam’s sharp senses picked up the aroma of Halfling pipe weed. Pausing and waiting, the thief’s caution was rewarded as he saw a Halflings face illuminated as it puffed at a pipe from a low crevice hidden in the corridor. The thief noted the location as an excellent point for an ambush. Willyam recalled tales of tribes of Halflings dwelling deep underground known as Under Halflings. They were notorious for their thievery and ill nature. Returning to his companion the two agreed to try talking before violence. Willyam crept back to the Halflings hiding place, knelt down so it was obvious that he knew were the rogue was and extended his hand to help the little fellow out.

The two struck up a conversation. The Under Halfling was part of a larger group that claimed the northern caverns. The diminutive fellow was called Karl and if they needed a place to recover they were welcome to use their caves. The odd looking Halfling also mentioned a treasure guarded by a large toad to the north. He didn’t know what the treasure was but knew the toad must be keeping something because “that’s what toads do ‘eh governor?” He warned that the toad had swallowed an Under Halfling whole and advised they take care. Ugh readied his mighty two handed blade and set off toad hunting.

The cavern of the Toad was vast. Along the northern wall a large lake loomed and from the lake sprung a waterfall running in reverse. Not seeing any immediate threat Ugh took to poling through the edges of the lake with his 10’ pole. His searching was rewarded as he struck a solid object. It was then that his dark vision spotted the huge toad swimming towards the shore. Falling back the warrior prepared for the toad to beach itself. Willyam readied a flaming oil flask. The toad made the shore. Strange vapor played around the immense beasts mouth. The half orc charged. The toad’s head flew off. Blood and foul ichor drenched the half orc. Ugh earned the monicker toad slayer. The object in the lake turned out to be a locked coffer, which Willyam deftly picked after oiling the lock. It contained a valuable necklace worth a small fortune.

Pressing on the group uncovered a well dedicated to the healing gods. It had long been covered with mineral deposits and its once lavish decorations were barely visible. The water within it had long turned brackish. As the party was uninjured they did not see the need to drink from the fountain. Further exploration revealed a flaming ball rolling around the ceiling at the end of a cavernous corridor. Suspecting something more to the mystery further exploration was defeated by bolts of fire that on occasion leapt from the flaming ceiling sphere. Additonal exploration revealed a stone tablet clutched in the skeletal fingers of a long dead priest. The tablet served as a scroll to some loathsome deity and was inscribed in a magical language neither adventurer could decipher. Eventually the party struck south as Willyam had the notion to find the ooze Ugh had told him about.

Instead the party ventured far further south than they had intended and found a natural chamber full of mushroom patches in which lurked a hobgoblin. The hobgoblin was a friendly sort. He had escaped some sort of dungeon deeper in the earth. He warned them of some of the local inhabitants. Crab men to the east and Troglydtyes to the South. The friendly goblinoid, called Furby had little else to offer information wise. It was here that the party decided to retreat back to the surface their foray done for the time being.